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Don’t Be So Hard on Yourself

Posted on May 20, 2019July 11, 2019 by cethomsen

I wish you could see all the good you do. You are definitely enough. Motherhood is hard. There are times when you won’t do it right or think you didn’t do it right. Don’t fret over each mistakes. We are all trying our best and sometimes just surviving the day is a sign of accomplishment.

Watch this YOU ARE ENOUGH video.

My mom was a great example and made mothering look so easy. She had 14 of her own children and always said she wanted 14 more. Being around kids my whole life, I figured motherhood would be easy…then I had my first child. No one told me how much work kids would be, how much time I would spend on my kids, and how much I really didn’t know about raising kids. I remember taking our little one home from the hospital thinking, “Are you sure you should be sending this baby home with us? We don’t even know what we are doing!” It seemed like we would just learn how to do one thing and then something else would come up that we’d have to figure out.

I have learned a lot about myself parenting in the last 17 years. When times get tough or our kids don’t turn out exactly the way we think they should, we can’t feel guilt or anxiety and assume it is all our fault. We all want to have great kids, but there has to be some trial and error to get us to that point. We will make mistakes as moms, our kids will make mistakes. That’s a part of life. But how we learn from our imperfections and errors is what will make us great.

Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive that is

you-er than you! Shout aloud, “I am glad, to be what I am!” Thank goodness

I’m not a clam or a ham or a dusty old jar of Goosberry jam!

I am what I am! What a great thing to be! If I say so myself

Happy Everyday to be me!

Dr Seuss

So if you have a bad day, or if you just feel like a crappy mother remember, “You are amazing!” Stick with it and you will see amazing things! Here are a few things that I do to help me turn my focus from feeling sorry for myself or feeling like a failure to being happy and cheerful.

  • Take a little “Me” time. Find time to do something you love.
  • Fill your life with good people who will lift you and sustain you when you feel down or doubt yourself.
  • Be one with your spouse. Don’t do it alone. Work together as parents.
  • Have playdates…for you and your kids. I loved having people over when my kids were little. The kids could play and I could have awesome friends to talk with.
  • Count your blessings. Focus on the good in your life. Keep a gratitude journal or think of 3 new things that happened each night.
  • Straighten your house. I feel so much better if I clean off my counter or do the dishes in the sink.
  • Get enough sleep! Ha Ha! I’m sorry if your kids are little, but when I am super tired, I am not a very patient or nice mom.
  • Find someone to serve. This always distracts me from my problems. There are so many people who have it worse than me. Lifting someone else always lifts my spirits too.
  • Put down your phone and do something with your kids. Play a game, go to the park, whatever. Turn your focus from everyone else’s “picture perfect” life and focus on yours.
  • Go for a walk. Get outside. Get some sunshine. Enjoy nature. You will feel much better afterwards!
  • Eliminate negative self talk. Tell yourself you are good! You are amazing! You’ve got this!
  • Laugh…a good hard belly laugh, make your cheeks hurt laugh.
  • Find an inspirational podcast or book on tape. Feed and fuel your mind with positive things.
  • Find a hobby or craft or take some online classes.
  • Pray. Tell the Lord what your struggles and frustrations are as a parent. Ask for guidance and help in what you can do better as a mom. Surely He will help you through it!
  • Don’t yell. Speak softly for an entire day.
  • Take a long, hot bath or shower. That is my meditation time.
  • Exercise regularly.
  • Slow down. Say NO to something so that you can say yes to your kids.
  • Don’t compare your weaknesses to someone else’s strengths.
  • Find your strengths and work on developing them. If you don’t know what your strengths are, ask someone who knows you well.

Imagine the Lord saying, “The greatest gift I could give to you is if you could see yourself the way I do.” You have so much good and potential and worth in you! Keep at it and you will see miracles in your life and kids!

Things that inspired me today.

  • YOU ARE ENOUGH video
  • 4 Reasons To Stop Being so Hard on Yourself
  • Being Hard on Yourself
  • Self-Improvement
  • You are enough
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