Modesty is a fading fashion! Styles are definitely getting tighter, shorter, and more revealing. The first thing you have to decide is what is modesty for you and what’s appropriate for your kids. Where is the line that you will draw? My view of modesty is that we cover up by wearing knee-length shorts and skirts and tops that cover shoulders, chest and cleavage, stomach and back.
I remember when my daughter was 6 months old and she was in a cute little tank dress. Someone told me that you should dress your daughters now for how you want them to dress as a teenager. I hadn’t ever really thought of that. So from then on, my girls always wore a onesie or undershirt underneath all of their tops. Here is a link to some we like. It is interesting that I have never had an issue with them wanting to wear any skimpy clothes. They are comfortable in modest clothes and aren’t interested in any of the revealing trends.
Girls are definitely a target for being an “object” to look at instead of a person with qualities to be admired. Years ago, I attended a class with Lindsay and Lexie Kite. They spoke about body image, self-worth, and women’s representation in the media. It is amazing how much pressure woman have to look and dress a certain way. Guys seem to have it easier. I never have an issue with finding modest clothes for my son.
I remember watching an episode of “How Do I Look” where the lady getting a makeover thought dressing with revealing clothing was sexy. To show her how others felt, they did an experiment with 4 life sized cut-out pictures of her body, starting with very revealing dress to more pieces added to the dress. They asked guys which one was sexiest. They almost all chose the dress with the highest neckline and longest skirt. Being modest can be sexy and fashionable.
When you can’t find modest clothes, alter what you have to make it work. I am so grateful I took a sewing class in high school. My sewing skills have made a huge impact on my ability to dress my kids modestly. I also like to shop at thrift stores. I can buy out of style, bell-bottom jeans and cut them into shorts. I take long-sleeve shirts and cut them to make short-sleeves. The beauty of it is that you can hem to any length you want. This is also great to do when they get holes in the knees…just make them into shorts!
Here’s how I hem them. First, I have my kids’ try the pants on. Then I pin the length they want. Next, lay the clothes flat and cut the extra fabric off. Finally, sew one of the three favorite, easy hems. If you can cut and sew in a straight line-you can hem pants. If they are too wide in the legs you can sew on the inside of the pant leg (try them on inside-out to pin) to make them skinny jeans. You can make them as tight as you’d like. I have this rotary cutter, ruler, and mat for cutting in a straight line. My sewing machine is like this. I have also fixed dresses and swimsuit straps and added a piece in the front to make them fit better.
Watch out for anything that is see-through! Some fabrics are so thin. Also, look out for large arm or neck holes. My girls wear a tank top when they are younger before we get them a bra to keep things covered. I have seen so many young girls who unintentionally reveal all with see-through tops or large shirt holes. I’d recommend having a try on/organize clothes day so that you know just what clothes will need underclothing or altering.
How do you pick modest Prom dresses? Special occasions seem to bring out the most immodest styles of clothing. It is possible to find prom dresses that are modest. Here are some examples on Amazon. We have some neighbors that bought dresses on Amazon and were very happy with the results. Just pay close attention to body measurements. Some dresses may take some altering or a full body slip underneath to make it more modest.
Swimsuits are one area that seems to be getting skimpier. We look for swimsuits that have a higher neckline and cover the middle (either one or two piece). My kids also like to have swim shorts and a swim top for when they are playing on the beach or going to the pool.
We believe that our bodies are a temple and that we should dress them accordingly. Treat them with respect, take care of them and cover them with your best. I like to think, “Would I feel comfortable wearing this in the presence of my Lord?” That helps me want to dress my best. Dressing modestly really helps you feel more comfortable, have more confidence, feel peace, and allows you to be a good influence on others.
Things that inspired me.